Sunset and Sound

Sun phenomenons are compelling;

as a medium it’s intrinsically empathic, communicating patently human sensibilities. 

 Fortunately, human can experience several sun phenomenons, out of many, including sunset. It is always been easy with sunset, the one that is completely original, easily understood and often reminisced. Sometimes it says something profound whilst palatable enough to be comprehended by anyone as the sun drops towards the horizon, progressively loses violets and blues, then greens and yellows, and finally even the oranges, leaving only the reds behind.

I watched the sun descend through the sky, towards the horizon, and marvel at how the sun remains the same size all the way down. I thanked, my heart profoundly enchanted when the mixture of colors models sunsets, when sunlight must travel a much greater distance through the atmosphere than when the sun is overhead; resulting in a greater amount of scattering which removes more and more of the shorter-wavelength colors, leaving reds, oranges, and yellows.


The feeling, the smell, and the breeze, are completed with a sound from a song I feel profoundly for. Yet it build an imagination of how will it gets better. The song which is a cue to a memory with a friend, a solemn one. It is not a song I often play. A song that accompany me through my journey of seeing sun, on other time to feel a presence of an absence. As those, combined, release a bucket of endogenous analgesia out of my limbic. On spur of moment, everything is alright, again.


Sunset, wind, blanket, hummus, and we are safe.



Audi-noci are the combination of senses I cherish. Eyes shut, Chopin’s notation trembled, with pheromones brought by the ideal pressure of a deep breath entering its polymodal pathway. Oftentimes, it is an ideal kind of peace.

Trial and Error Will Lead To Joys

There are days when all of a sudden you are disconnected to the world.

There are days in which you’ve realized something essentials for your life-travel. 

Those days are here, swirling through my tiny un-bunned hair.

It was the day when I literally lost my mobile connection due to 3-day-heavy rain in Ruteng. Not completely due to the romanticize resulting from the haze, cold, and a little exposure of lights that I had these thoughts. Though, the feeling was there; a strike to have a space for unexpected life’s lemons.

Have you had those moments where you can not really grab the idea of things universe gave to you? Struggling to ruminate, swallow, and digest; but still didn’t get the extract, you just poo it through. I had it in me as the sun reflect its rays back from my glasses.

Just like the sun is enough for the whole world, our capacity should be enough for our struggles.

I saw the sun rays into Ruteng skies on my way to hospital.

Two thousand and sixteen marked and shaped me persistently in a way that I did not accept before. I hate every single of those time and things might get twisted here and there but being grateful is all I need to keep the loop longing but not to have it come back to square one. A fathom that I accept; it is indeed an experience I needed even if I did cry my eyes out way back there.

The motto is: iStruggle 2016, iSurvive 2016, I better get things out of it. Not to mention that I face things harder than everyone else, I am certainly not. Everyone is struggling. But I believe in a saying as the circumstance level grows harder, we are also tougher. And we owe it to ourselves, a struggle to make us a human we wanted to.

I like to believe that at the end of the day I will judge who I am as a solemn human creature rather on how I easily get things I wanted with unlimited amount of dollars. A faith that I hope will and still persist. Thus, I would like to change the game to a slow-pace on this race for a moment; to look around and see if I like where I am heading. A room to clarify my assumptions because I am never hundred percent sure about anything. Shall I try things out and see which one actually works. Shall I always curios and eager to learn, which suppose to affect so many things in my life. Thinking that these will be fun for moments because if there is gun to my head, if I had to leave the house all day, every day, I would go and do this. As Albert Einstein once said,

Nobody is able to achieve this completely, but the striving for such achievement is in itself a part of the liberation, and a foundation for inner security.

To joys!

To the essentials!

Bertemulah dengan Bapa Victor

Liang Bua, Dusun Rampasasa, Manggarai.

11 November 2016.

“Tiga ratus lima puluh ribu sa, Kaka”, kata seorang Bapa yang membantu menerjemahkan percakapan saya dan kawan-kawan dengan Bapa Victor ketika kami ingin berfoto bersama. Dengan demikian, Bapa Victor menyatakan bahwa ia bersedia diperlakukan sebagai objek. Nyatanya, ia memang salah satu ‘destinasi’ utama para penjelajah Manggarai. Tapi tetap saja gila karena dalam kepercayaan kami, Bapa Victor bukanlah Homo floresiensis yang tersohor itu namun Homo sapiens dengan kretinisme.

Setelah proses tawar-menawar, 10 ribu!

Bapa Victor tinggal di dekat Liang Bua, yang merupakan salah satu lokasi penelitian arkeologi nasional terbaik di Indonesia; situs penemuan fosil Homo floresiensis yang menunjukkan hadirnya peradaban kuno yang sangat tua. Di dalam gua dingin yang diyakini sebagai tempat tinggal manusia purba ini, kami mencoba merasakan ambiens dan mengeruk-ngeruk a la arkeolog amatir.

Dikarenakan menghadap ke timur laut, gua ini tidak begitu lembab karena terpapar sinar matahari yang cukup meski dekat dengan sumber air. Selain itu, tingginya yang kurang lebih 25 m membuat saya berimajinasi bahwa bukan tidak mungkin gajah purba Stegodon sondaari ‘dipelihara’ disini. Kata Bapa Cornelis sang penjaga Liang Bua, lokasi ini juga merupakan salah satu situs utama penemuan fosil komodo (Varanus komodoensis), Betu (Papagomys armandvillei), dan Flo (Homo floresiensis). Dari beberapa tulisan, dikatakan bahwa memahami Flo membutuhkan penelusuran masa lalu, masa kini, dan pemahaman kajian implikasinya di masa depan yang masih terus diteliti; terbukti dengan kedatangan anual para arkeolog ke situs ini.

Bapa Victor merupakan salah satu warga dusun Rampasasa suspek keturunan linear Homo floresiensis yang masih bertahan. Kepercayaan ini menjadikan dusun Rampasasa menjadi destinasi menarik untuk melihat manusia Hobbit; menjadikan Bapa Victor didatangi para jurnalis budaya serta traveller untuk dimasukkan ke dalam berita dan mendapat duit sebesar tiga ratus lima puluh ribu rupiah. Terlepas dari kebenaran identitasnya sebagai turunan Flo, Bapa Victor tinggal sendiri, tidak bisa berbahasa Indonesia, dan telah sulit berdiri. Bapa pun mungkin tidak familiar dengan hiruk-pikuk-kikuk kehidupan politik sosial ekonomi di luar sana serta tidak menyadari bahwa dirinya telah menjadi aksis beberapa sumber pendapatan.

Jika bertemu dengan Bapa Victor ucapan “tiba tei, Bapa” akan ia anggap sebagai akibat dari foto bersama namun yakini, tiba tei Bapa atas peran Bapa dalam menimbulkan atraksi di dusun Rampasasa, Pulau Flores, dan bahkan Indonesia, semoga Bapa Victor sehat dan tahu bahwa Bapa telah membawa manfaat dan bermakna lebih dari sekedar lembaran.

Smorgasbord of Theopolitics

On a way to Golo Curu Hill, East Nusa Tenggara, I saw an unpretentious writing on the back of mini truck. It is undeniable that these kind of writings are representing our societies’ voices just like another writing says “gara-gara sms, bojoku minggat” or “putus hati sudah biasa, putus rem mati kita”. Truly honest as there is an increasing amount of biggots provoking society hiding behind religion’s shield.

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A message on a back of mini truck from Ruteng, East Nusa Tenggara.

Responding to some inter/cross-faiths frictions recently, in my genuine rakyat jelata’s opinion whom might does not concerned you, it is merely political. I’d rather to think that it is rarely happened due to specific theological differences but rather on political and social implication which already happened even way before civilization occur. Though religion and state are different — religion is located on domestic sphere which has transcendent and vertical relationship while states are located on public sphere with horizontal relationship inter-individually — the exploitation of religion for secular ends is a constant in political and social history. Not to think that I suggest that religion is nothing more than a cynical facade for power struggle — well it can be that but also to remind that human ability to bend religion to political or commercial ends should not diminish the profounds spiritual power that personal belief can have in shaping one’s personal life or societies’ behavior at large. It is all make sense because power invariably attracts religion and religion attracts power.  I remember Abdurrahman Wahid once said things about indigenousity of Islam in Indonesia which has to consider the reality of Indonesia itself, plurality and empirically formed, bukan dari langit.

Not only textual, but it is gallant to view things contextually. Thus, let us try to be more sensitive to what is really happening to us while constantly do good deeds as much as we can, as His order, if we are truly His believer. Be careful, because sometimes religion serves as a handy tag, constitutes an important element of identity in which specific theology problem is really only incidental.

Remember, in fact, we are rarely Muslims, Christians, or Jews by choice; we are born into one if these traditions whose richness of community we accept rather than really choose the alternatives offered.

Be careful, even when we know that we are right, we are not instantly have the rights to say that others are wrong. Be careful, I am afraid that people are too busy focusing on hating each other faiths while at the same time they are losing the grip of the religion itself; love and peace. 

Because the nub of problem; who is to say which opinion is “correct” or “right”? If it is God, as your belief, then who are you to decide? As unpretentious as the writings of the back of this mini-truck, let’s pray to our one and only God; to forgive them who provoke.

Autumn Leaves

Kawaguchi-ko, November 2016.

With a blue knitted sweater I bought for €2 in a Flöhmarkt at Mauerpark, I hear it roams.

They were all green, once.

The red leaves scream their final cries in color before dropping. It is the autumn leaves —however you choose to see it. One of the season people enjoyed, orchrestrating a complexity of leaves in agony.

Rushing the Caffeine Rush

My interest in coffee started subconsciously through my mother preferences to regularly drink coffee 3 cups a day. As far as I remember, my initial encounter was way back in my first year of university. Do not want to rambling about the academic lyfe but sure this caffeinated liquid was such a booze which later has become more of a ritual rather than a necessity.

It is five years from that initial time and coffee has particular portion of my life’s pie chart. Wherever I go, ‘best coffee in town’ were keywords I cherished the most on my search engine. When I travel, I often choose coffee shops over tourist landmark or shopping mall, stacking a dozen of Indocafe Coffeemix coffee powder (this is the moment you’d realize that I am not a coffee-snob, yet) in which some times Aero Press is still uninstant enough. I actually began to learn, analyze, and be profound about her. To actually taking certified course and talking to about her. And by the way, yes, it is a she.

November 5th, 2016.

After a long day, in the middle of Tokyo’s rushness I was rushing my steps through a Saturday-night-crowd in Shibuya, bumped to people here and there. At 07.37 p.m, I found it, a cornered small coffee space  with a small wooden bench outside, the #1 recommendation in Tokyo’s coffeersation; About Life Coffee Brewers. Not like other top-rank coffe shop, it is minimalist, unpretentious, has no fancy interior hung with coffee-related mural art and quotes about how coffee-person people are. People are genuinely here for coffee, most people will take their coffee to-go but I took a moment sitting on its bench and look around. I ordered a filter drip coffee with Burundi Kibingo and told the barista that I like her bitter.

I am not a Q grader nor a coffee-snob but one thing I know is I enjoy the coffee, there is something complex which made me realize how far I am in understanding her. Such a perfect drink to get adrenaline rush after rushing in the city full of rush-a-rush.